Dear Diary: Just trying to work through my inconsistent working habits...

December 3, 2018  11:08 am


Yo.
So, it's Monday and I have the day off. Actually, I had today and tomorrow off and then a guy at work, KJ, wanted to see the Sabres game tomorrow night. Anyway, after some schedule switching, etc. with another guy, he asked me if I wanted to work tomorrow from 7:30 am - 4:00 pm and I said sure. I work part-time but I like to have at least 30-32 hrs/week, and more if possible. This week I had three days off, so an extra shift, especially during Christmas month, is excellent news.
Coincidentally, I got a call this morning asking if I wanted to come in for a few hours because the person working today's 7:30 - 4:00 had availability issues and couldn't come in. So, they wondered if I wanted to come in for a few hours just to give some back-up for the two guys on already today.
I told them I couldn't because I had to do stuff today and I already got a shift for my other day off tomorrow. So, I had to turn them down, which I felt really bad about, but they understood.
Which brings me to my topic of today: how I invest my energies.

After working yesterday, a Sunday, which is typically pretty busy throughout, at least until 1:00 when the Bills game usually starts, I came home very tired, filled with the knowledge that I worked hard and consistently so throughout my shift. In general I think I'm a good worker, but yesterday I thought I worked particularly hard throughout the day. I think I have a reputation already for being a good worker amongst my colleagues and the management, but yesterday I thought my performance throughout the day underlined that fact, at least to me. I'm not saying all this to say how great a worker I am, but yesterday was just a solid fucking working day.
Having said that, I am nowhere NEAR as consistent applying the same productive energy to my own personal life: artwork, creative projects, household responsibilities, etc. And that's something I really need to address.

12:00 pm

Hmmm... if midnight is the "witching hour," what is noon?

1:20 pm

Well, so much for trying to work through chores and occasionally taking "little breaks" to write here a little bit. I've been pretty much goofing off on the internet for the last hour and 15 minutes.
Nuts.
Well, I was also FB messaging a friend, so that was constructive.

Man, all I want to do is eat and goof off.
ARGHH.

1:59 pm

Okay, dammit.
I put the wash in the dryer and put the underwear in the wash. But, I also made some Uncle Ben's Creamy Four Cheese Ready Rice! This Uncle Ben's Ready Rice is great! It reminds me of when I was a bachelor living at 78 E. Oakwood Pl in Buffalo and I would regularly eat Rice 'n' Sauce or make spaghetti but without sauce (so I didn't have to clean a pan!) and I would just use seasoned salt and hot sauce for flavoring. This Ready Rice is really awesome because you just microwave the package for 90 seconds, let it sit and then eat. You don't even dirty up a pan! Amazing! And they have a number of flavors, too.
NOTE: Alas, the house in Buffalo is no longer there. About five years ago I was shocked to discover the place was completely GONE. Poof! I drove over there just to check the place out and it was just a grass lot! Holy crap. So much for revisiting childhood memories.  :(

2:39 pm

Goddammit.
I am NOT getting ANYTHING done. Jeez, thank goodness for machines being able to wash and dry clothes or I wouldn't have accomplished anything today.
FUCK.
And oh yeah, so much for not swearing too much in my blogs.
ARGHH! Okay, I'm going to do... something...
*stomps off crankily*

3:15 pm

Okay, I cleared the kitchen sink, meaning I put the dirty dishes, etc. in the dishwasher or manually washed them, depending on whatever it was.
Next!

5:21 pm

I also folded some clothes and stuck a load of wet clothes in the dryer. Then I went outside and grabbed our extension ladder and trimmed some branches that were hanging over our front gutter. When they load up with snow, they dump the snow straight into the gutter and plug it up. Last year, the gutter seemed to be frozen in parts and overflowing. So, we assumed it was plugged a bit where the, uh, bush/tree/thing was hanging over it (I have no idea what kind of shrubbery it is, dammit!).
Then I dragged the trimmed branches to the back. We also had collected some branches from over the year and piled them in front of the garage out back. So, I picked those up as well and brought all of it to the way back and dumped it off. Then I hung up the extension ladder on the garage wall again and came back in.
Anticipating negotiating that extension ladder sort of kept me from jumping into doing this chore, but now that it's done, it really wasn't too bad and I'm glad I finally got it over with. Plus, I managed to, more or less, accomplish it while there was still overcast daylight outside.
Yay!
So, that was good.

But, it's dark now and my original plan to do some chores here before heading out to our old house and clean it some more didn't happen. I mean, I'm not going to the old house now. So, that was a fail on my part.
I'll have to try and make it up later in the week.

Meanwhile, while fucking goofing off on the fucking internet like a fucking fuck earlier today, I saw that Sam Qualiana, a local filmmaker, was selling on eBay an autographed copy of the script for his latest film, POST-APOCALYPTIC COMMANDO SHARK, including a magnet and DVD of the film as well. Or so I thought.
Now, in the last month or so, I've been talking a lot to Sam because of a number of creative accomplishments he recently had. In November, at the Buffalo Dreams Fantastic Film Festival, Sam premiered his latest film, the aforementioned POST-APOCALYPTIC COMMANDO SHARK (PACS). But he also revealed he had written a sci-fi fantasy/adventure novel called Journey of the Avenger and he was doing an Indiegogo fundraiser to raise the cash to pay for hiring an artist to do the cover and also to pay for self-publishing the book.
Anyway, cutting to the chase, both of those events kind of got me communicating with Sam far more often than I normally do. In fact, I was kind of going out of my way to see if he'd be interested in working together on some projects. And he was definitely interested.
One of the projects was doing a comic book adaptation of PACS and I thought that would be fun.
So, in an effort to both support Sam the filmmaker and also get a copy of the script to get some ideas for the comic book, I decided to bid on the script he had on eBay. Well, it was after I bid 26 bucks that I realized he was actually offering only the autographed script COVER PAGE, not the script with it.
Whu-- wait. What???
ARGHHH!

So, yeah, four hours later and the auction's over and I won the bid.
I then FB messaged Sam and said I was actually looking to buy the script and then realized my error, so I just straight out asked him for a copy of the script. He laughed and immediately sent me the files.
D'oh!
Buyer, don't make assumptions and read the product description better!

Whatever.
Anyway, I'm sure I'll elaborate more on my involvement with Sam and his Metroshia Productions film empire in future posts at my film blog. Stay tuned!

6:11 pm

Finally, I did ANOTHER impulsive thing today. I don't even know why I did it TODAY. I had been thinking about the idea off and on now for several months but there was no real reason to initiate anything towards fulfilling it today, but that didn't stop me because I'm compulsively impulsive.
Anyway, there's a young woman I know who is a big horror fan and she regularly participates in a local haunted house during the Halloween season. She also is an actress and that's how I first heard about her. She's starred in a couple movies made by local low-budget horror auteur Emir Skalonja (which is where I really first heard about her), but I made a point of contacting her after she did a short film with John Karyus last year, made by Rochester filmmaker Curt Markham. I'm friends with Curt and John and I loved Curt's short film, so that prompted me to FB friend request her and she accepted. Anyway, I had this art idea percolating in my brain for a few years but I actually thought about using another local model, but for some reason I was going back and forth about it. But after seeing this other actress and hearing how enthusiastic she was about the horror genre, she seemed a better fit with my idea.
Anyway, I happened to be commenting on a FB status she made today, and I think that's what arbitrarily prompted me to propose this project to her. Since I haven't heard back from her yet, I'm going to hold off revealing her name.
But, stay tuned for that as well.

Alright, I'm gonna end this.
My wife's home and I should eat. Plus, I could probably do something else constructive tonight.
Oh! Actually, I have to watch a movie and then review it. So, I do have shit I have to do!

Later!

Dear Diary: If only I WERE a Mobster...

October 17, 2008 2:05 pm

... uh, financially speaking, mind you.

So, about a week or so ago, this guy at work--uh, we'll call him Gears Dude or GD for short-- told me that he invited me on Myspace to join his "mob" in the online game Mobsters.
I'm like, "Okay..." but I was a little thrown because I really don't do any computer games or online games at all.
But, I could at least join up and support him by expanding his mob.

Well, since then... I've been playing the damn thing fairly regularly.
I don't know if it's just a Myspace thing/application or if there's other variations of Mobsters online, but it's been an interesting time waster.
And I guess it's a text game versus an actual, uh, what, role playing game? There's no character online, other than my name (which is il bovini fabbrica, and about the closest I could come (with my very limited, non-existent knowledge of Italian) to "cattleworks") so I'm not watching myself running around on-screen armed with a tommygun or AK-47 or whatever (actually, tommyguns aren't an "equipment" option, I guess that's too old school). The computer does most (well, all) of the work.
You pick a fight from a list of other mobsters online, pressing a button and then a couple seconds later, it tells you if you won or lost.
Which is fine by me.
Right now, I'm 26 - 46, wins/losses. Yeah. Luckily this is all virtual or else my "recruitment drive" would suck even more (and I'm being very sarcastic here-- I don't really enlist other people from Myspace friends list at all, even though the game is constantly suggesting/pushing that tactic. But, I only picked one or two people that i thought would even be halfway interested (and so far, no takers, so my mob has just GD and me, plus the "500" invisible, virtual mobsters that automatically come with your mob when you start).
But the thing I'm really getting into, and I don't know if this is a reflection of the current headlines regarding economic meltdown, etc., is that you can buy property and develop it, and you earn money.
Depending on the type of property you purchase, you get a certain amount of financial return, interest.
Currently, I seem to be making just under $2000 every 55 minutes-- yeah... if only.
And this goes on while you're offline as well.
So, it was really cool leaving the game yesterday with zero money (well, I keep all my money in the "bank" for safe keeping. Your money accrues outside of the bank. Uh, maybe when I go to the mattresses, I check underneath them first for any dough?).
Yeah, I'm a laff-riot.
Whatever.
So, yesterday my money was zero in the mystery virtual money area.
Today, I go online, and I'm to the good-- OVER $40,000.
Uh huh-- like, holy mamma mia, right?

Ooooh, I want that money!!!!

So, while I'm getting mildly massacred in various fights daily, I'm doing well financially.
And THAT'S all I really care about, baby!

*sigh*


However, in the real world:
Well, it looks like a significant event will be occurring in my life in the near future. Next week, as a matter of fact.
It looks like my dad is going to give me the money to buy an iMac, which I'll be setting up at his house.
Ostensibly, he'll be using it for very mundane purposes; specifically, to reformat all his various notebooks that are cataloging his hundreds of VHS tapes. Each of these tapes have several different programs he's taped off the TV and he has a listing of what they are and roughly how far in each tape each program is.
It's all in his handwriting and he wants to type it all out neatly.
This is something he's been talking about for a while.
He bought a computer several years ago, a PC, maybe over 10 years ago, but he never really followed through on it. And now, it doesn't seem to work, perhaps through years of disuse?
I dunno.

But, this may be the perfect stone that kills two birds.
He gets his computer to work on updating and converting his notebooks and I get my computer for art and movie applications. I'm probably getting the best out of this deal, totally exploiting my dad's finances, but it's with his blessing, so, I ain't friggin' complaining, by god!

So, barring any awful new turn of events, this should happen next week.
And then-- and THEN-- we'll see how long it takes for me to produce a short film.
Hopefully in time for the November meeting of the Buffalo Movie and Video Makers Club (BM-VM), which I believe is 11/9.

*deep, hopeful and excited breath*

Stay tuned!
And who knows, by next week, I may be able to afford a bulletproof Escalade! (I'm back to Mobsters! Come on! Try to keep up here!)

Okay, later.
I need to go to sleep before tonight's night shift.

PS: "DD" stands for Dear Diary, natch!

Dear Diary: Man, I'm just really out of it...

... or at least it seems that way judging by my blogging output.

All sorts of things are going on here.

The news in the last weeks of the economic meltdown nationally, and then internationally, has been in my head. Can't help but wonder what shoe is going to drop in my life because of all this crap.
Prior to the meltdown news, there were already rumblings at work that things weren't going well.
They aren't selling as many ads as they like, so that may affect us, like in terms of lay-offs.
Okay, actually, my boss said (more or less), that ads are down and the owners are going to be taking a much more hands on approach to things. The various managers of the departments are going to be giving a report of where they think they can save money and then they'll see what shakes out from those reports and recommendations.
Meanwhile, my boss intimated that if there was a layoff (or more), I wasn't going to be affected. For now (that's me saying THAT).

This info was passed on to me and a couple other employees because we were in my boss's office complaining about a particular situation and then he dropped this news on us. He said that if there were any layoffs (and specifically, I think he had one particular person in mind) it wouldn't affect us three.

But the bad news regarding the company's situation was news to me and sort of overshadowed the main reason why I went in to see him.
My reaction was this: prepare for the worst, hope for the best.

And then, a week or so later, the whole $700 billion crap hit the news and fans.

I had been idly thinking about getting another job already, like, for the last several months, primarily to escape my two overnight shifts a week. If I it weren't for those two days (well, nights, actually), I'd probably be more content to simply working there and trying to do my creative stuff on the side.
But, I didn't have any real options that I was considering in terms of other jobs.

Really, I'd like to do something with film and/or comics.
But, I'm not really prepared with either (in terms of a resume or portfolio), and even if I was, the job(s) I kept envisioning was purely an impractical fantasy, like self-publishing comics.

So, now what?

I don't know.

The good news is, I'm not laid off yet.

So, I think my current game plan is this: impractical fantasies be damned, I need to work on my resume/portfolio so I'm not starting from zero if the big layoff bomb drops on my head.
From an art standpoint it first means: get off my ass and draw a lot more. Like, at all.
So far, I'm still in the talk more and do (draw) less mode, when I should be in a draw more, talk less mode, obviously.

Regarding film(making): this year I've been elected to be the co-programming chair (along with Phil Utech) of this years's Buffalo Movie and Filmmakers Club (or BM-VM), which is in its 75th year. We meet once monthly, and Phil and I are in charge of coming up with the meeting's programming.
But along with these duties, I still occasionally help people out with their films, doing whatever they want me to.
But I haven't made my own film yet.
And I'm currently looking to finagle an iMac in order to enable myself to make some movies.
In order to do this, it looks like I'm content to exploit my retired 82 year-old father's finances. I won't go into the specifics, but that's basically the situation. Actually, more or less with his blessing. But still... I feel a little guilty spending his money.

However, if it means I actually start to make some damn movies, even short ones, instead of just whining about other people's films, then I really don't care.

Alright, this was just getting my toes back into the blogging water.
And, I think I'll be whining more often here, using this blog like a diary, ya lucky sucks. Whether that's good news or bad news for you "readers", I don't know (uh, althoguh I have a hunch).

Anyway, thanks for checking this out if there are any of you out there!
Later.